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Tour Diaries: These Boots Were Made For Horrors (Patreon)

Published:
2023-08-25 17:03:00
Imported:
2026-06
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Content

The girlies recover from shell-shock and reflect on the litany of 9/11s that befell them in Atlanta, how one very special pair of Boots saved them from the brink, Eliza gets some free psychoanalysis from future therapist Julia, and more. 

Comments

Alex G

Thank god

liz

today is a blessed day

Lucie

NEEDED THIS tour diaries pt 1 made me CACKLE

Amy

atlanta still loves you 🩶🩶

Astrid B

everybody cheered

Lauren Brooks

extremely bored at work THANK U QUEENS

Skye Ford

omg two eps in one week??

cyansims

missed my girlies 🤧💗

Alex G

The horrors are quelled… for the next hour

Selah Judge

I need this to get through this morning 😚

Alexia B

was at work about to kms but now i wont

Anna Thorson

the secondhand stress I am experiencing 😭 you girlies are survivors

Haven Patrick

god i was so nervous meeting you all. didn't even gush over the impact y'all have but nashville was so fun!! boooooots

Kay

I am saved

SlenderLADY 💅🏽

Eliza what do you do with the kitties when you and Max are away?

saige

daaaaaaaamn! i wish i was able to get tix to the atl show. i could see yall doing The Earl next time. i feel like that venue could be less 9/11-y.

Zoee Keiser

Truly cackling at the relatability of just a phone and weed vape in boot barn

Luteal Swan

There was a boot barn where I used to live and they honestly have some cute clothes lol

Luteal Swan

Also check thrift stores/ vintage stores for boots! I found a gorgina pair of baby blue cowgirl boots for like $60

Brooke Stocco

me + my praise kink LOVING the “best crowd ever trophy” 🫢 atl forever

Grace

thank you queens for sharing your boot barn journey!!! I need boots so I can go volunteer at horse therapy!!!!! you influence my life for the better every day ♥️

Sydney Higgins

this was fucking hilarious and added to the list of eps that made me bust out laughing

Moo

I sooooo regret not wearing my boots to the Nashville show 🥲🥲🥲

Devorah Klein

My personal 911 was being scammed through Lex while trying to buy resell tickets for the Chicago show.

Kendall

the power of the Boot

kerrie

the timing of this episode is exquisite as I am driving 40 mins to my local boot barn tomorrow to get booted up in preparation for ACL…. was there a clearance section tho binchies lolol

Haley

bootbootBOOT boot BüT

Maya Harris

julia im beaming with nachas cause we’ve been with you through so much growth. i definitely have been in a place of jewish disaster anxiety and am currently working towards the mindset you’re in.

Jillian

So… no Florida?????

Maya Harris
>>116040683

also someone tell me the meds actually work for anxiety cause my snri has been wonders for depression but adding abilify for that crippling anxiety

Hannah

Speaking up as a listener who feels v seen by Eliza’s doomer tendencies lol

Meredith Floyd

so whenever y’all want to come to texas … come to fort worth and you can wear your bööts again 🤠

cori tinkham

I was at the atl show and it was well worth the wait 💘 but wtf i’m so sorry about the venue threatening to sue ?? they made hella money just with the drink minimum 💀💀 I ordered a bottle of water at one point and they were like hOpE yOu KnOw ThAt DoEsN’t CoUnt

Allyson Medlin

ATL show forever it was so gorgina 💗💕💖❤️💝

Vanessa Thomas

The lore that has come from this tour will sustain the binchies for years to come

M

I am so sorry that these venues are not taking both you ladies seriously even though you are highly successful in selling out those bitches. Eliza, this is probably a very redundant question, but have you thought about bringing your own USB-C if the venues are going to be Triflin?

Jane L.

the Atlanta venue hates nuance….

Dianna Cohen

eliza i also have natural disaster fears that i project strongly onto my cats.... terrified of tornadoes bc what if i have to wrangle my 2 cats into the basement quickly..... (i live in north jersey we do not have tornados)

em

“zen passing” me as a virgo rising

Kay

Boot barn is one of my favorite stories on this whole pod

Isabella

this episode was on par with traumageddon 2: hallucinogenic hell (binchtopia lore) soooOo funny

Emily

Wide foot awareness!! It took many a line dance at my local bar to STRETCH my booots

Madeline Mauk

i’m a binchie that loves and appreciates the doom spiral and in fact can we have an entire doomsday episode. ps @ eliza i think so much of it is being responsible for the life of another being i.e. bug and harley. like if it was just me ok RIP but i have my babies to protect

savannah
>>116047362

was lowkey gonna say the same thing! you unfortunately cant trust these bitches you have to bring your own shit!!

reilly

Omg I was at the atlanta show and I’m obsessed with hearing y’all’s version of events!! Thank you for dissing the two item minimum though cause that shit pissed me off

reilly
>>116057266

but can confirm y’all fully slayed and tbh the chaotic energy was everything

jordan

the boot confidence is so real….I’m on a 12 month payment plan for my fucking boots 😭

Dynasti deGouville

I will say that atl is a predominantly black city so they're very accustomed to hosting black entertainers for an almost exclusively black audience lol that's probably why you felt like they didn't take you seriously. The venue in Norcross would have been much better since it's not in the center of the city. I suggest y'all do that if (when!) you come back (and I really hope you do 🥺)

shif

the actual anxiety and screaming crying throwing up I would experience if I had to go through these horrors…thank u for persevering 😭😭🙏🏽

Joe Rogan

Maybe redacted can wear the one non distressed boot out in the hurricane 🌀 👢

Maggie Howes

Girlies! As a Montana girly I obviously have always been buying my boots at Boot Barn! Love the representation also once won a Boot Barn giveaway and got free boots

Julia

if you want to distress your other boot just send it to the Atlanta airport! hope this helps!

Amy
>>116048546

No bc the MC deadass said she did hate nuance bc she didn’t understand it

Shelby Hobbs

never prouder to be a nashville binchie 🫡

Veronica

This patreon is truly money well spent

eva

omg as a texas girlie who bought her first pair of boots this summer- TRULY life changing i have never walked more confidently

eva
>>116076770

even wearing them for the 105° bike rides to class and i have to say it’s still worth it

Tori D

this was a deep intense therapy episode about disaster mindset and a need for control that i feel like i’ve experienced first hand 15x over and i just gotta say the girls who get it get it but also… my therapist called me out for my need for control and it also landed me in convos abt my childhood

Kamrin Baker

ELIZA I also am a huge disaster mindset girlie and live with constant anxiety but I contain multitudes and am a solutions journalist! So much of the reason I am able to get through the horrors is because my entire livelihood is me going "okay so this is really bad and scary but it's my job to find the people who are helping" and it has been a game changer. I won't plug my work because that's not the point of this comment but someone I really adore in the climate anxiety space is Alaina Wood. She is The Garbage Queen on TikTok/IG and is so amazing at sharing helpful and realistic climate info while also helping us stay level -headed, and dare I say... optimistic. Love y'all so much and totally relate with your very valid but debilitating fears. WEAR THOSE BOOTS!!

Shannon Burne

Binchies. I’m a nurse extern on a cardiothoracic icu floor and our head cardio surgeon ~exclusively~ wears cowboy boots to every shift. Every surgery. Hours this man stands in his boots doing surgery.

Grace
>>116032570

update to all my queens I thrifted a pair of $200 leather boots for $54!!! so may the luck of this episode bring you all prosperity!!!! 🍀

legumegorl

sooo reassuring to me that eliza is a fellow girly with wide ass feet

Marisa

Loved the whole episode but especially the talk about compulsive tendencies. Like I also doomscroll on TikTok to learn more information about stressful situations I’m dealing with. After like ten minutes of scrolling I know I’m not gonna learn any new information and instead it’s just letting me obsess over whatever disaster I’m worried about. Definitely have been shunned by my therapist to stop doing that to myself lolol. Also Julia is literally sooooo beautiful and hearing that she also picks her skin (as a fellow skin picker with so many scars on my legs) made me feel so comforted.

Devin

will say as an atlanta binchie we had such an incredible and hilarious time and it really did match the vibe of atlanta which is just consistently unhinged anyways. also the masquerade sucks ass and this is commonly known but there’s no reason y’all would have known that not being locals. anyways y’all slayed and there was much giggling and cackling from our table

Lucy Johanneman

if it makes y’all feel any better ab atl my friend and i were like “ooh slay 9pm? now we can go get dinner and drinks” so that was kinda a W for us and THEN the kitchen made our second round of drinks twice so i was feeling gorgeous and free leaving the underground. and you kept spirits high and it didn’t seem like anyone around me was upset in the slightest. we all knew none of it was your fault

Lucy Johanneman
>>116039151

which weekend are you going to? my friend and i are coming from ohio (✋🏼😳🤚🏼) weekend 2 and it’ll be just us two… should there be a binchy kiki meeting…

Grace Dolan

I had a nightmare about the Delta Lounge after listening to this, I wish I was kidding <3

Tiff

Lol looking for support re: doom scrolling. I have not been able to stop doom scrolling about covid and I am constantly looking at r/coronavirus. I feel like I live my life “normally” and mask in crowded areas but I constantly have anxiety about getting sick and people around me getting sick. I can’t stop washing my hands and if someone even coughs I spiral and worry that I’m going to get sick does anyone else have this problem :(

Tiff
>>116102426

Like my friend is a teacher so I am not hanging out with her at the moment because I fear that she’s been exposed to illness is this normal

Shannon O'Brien

Picturing Julia pulling off Eliza's boots in Boot Barn like a cartoon/Cinderella's evil step sisters is cracking me up 🤣 Glad you guys survived the horrors 🫡

Shannon O'Brien
>>116102426

I have this exact same problem!! It feels like it's eating me alive most of the time, especially that there seems to be a new surge rn 🙃

kerrie
>>116039151

also weekend 2!! (needed 2 see mother cain)a binchy kiki would be exquisitee my ig is kerrie.joyce if you want to dm me ab it!!

miss andry

Binches are braver than the marines 💜

Christa

30 minutes into this episode i got in my car, drove to boot barn, and spent $180 on fresh b00ts for st0mping

Christa

thank you for influencing me 👏🏼😭

Cici Oberhaus

OMG binchies in the atlanta show i was in the front row and one of the comedians made several comments on my boobs and then asked me in front of the whole crowd if my parents approved of me being gay? so i caught her off guard by being like "my mom is dead" (which is true) because who?? asks that?? like if i said my parents did not approve of me because i was gay what kind of joke would she have made of that lol??? anyways 9/11

Maddy Kristensen

PLEASE do an episode on the FAA/airline industry considering all of your ~horrors~

Hattie Carter

i was at the atl show and let me just say that venue was actually insane. im so glad yall also didnt like them bc i didn't want to hate them if they were really nice to you. to start- they charged 15$ if you DIDNT get two drinks. so my friend and i ordered a water (4$ btw!!) and a beer each. the waiter then informed us that water didn't count as one of our purchases but that we couldn't get a free cup of water? it had to be the 4$ bottled water. so we had to buy water and it couldn't count. i was a bit suss at this point but whatever, we just went ahead and ordered two beers each and two waters total. this is around 7pm (we got there early because we were driving far in). so around 9pm we get hungry right? and we ask for food. it did not come until after you guys arrived and started the set... so around 11pm. at this point i am feeling bad for the waiters but also am slightly starved and annoyed at the service. i plan to tip 10% when the waiter comes back because i realized it wasn't fundamentally her fault but also, it took 2 hours for our food (which is a bit crazy). so i get ready to give her the tip when she comes back around and she already had a 20% tip picked out on the little machine. i go to change it and she immediately stops me and gets a bit choked up saying that she needs the money. i feel like SHIT so i ended up tipping 20% still. this is all to say i have no backbone 🫶🫡. i also was high as hell while all of this was happening bc a lovely fellow binchie gave me a hit of her (incredibly strong) weed pen.

Hattie Carter
>>116131299

anyways this should've maybe been a mailbox moment but ended up getting typed here <3 had to share for the girlies who were not at the atl show!! my friend and i still love yall and were so glad to get to see you irl the venue was just full of horrors

Hattie Carter
>>116115813

stop stop we were sitting across from yall a little ways down and we were SO CONFUSED WITH THE BOOB COMMENTS

Poppy Summers

Ladies this episode is dangerous. I am now genuinely considering buying a pair of boots despite the fact that I live in south London

Julianna

Love you guys but really encourage you to buy a HDMI-USB converter to keep with you 🫶😂😂😂

Tiff
>>116102426

Ahh thank you I feel the same!! Feels like I’m in constant distress and it’s always in the back of my mind!

Cici Oberhaus
>>116115813

it was the same person who saw a "bitches hate nuance" shirt and said proudly "yes i do hate nuance" lmao she did not read the crowd

Sophie

Girlies with wide Neanderthal feet and foot dysmorphia rise up ….

Edie Irving

Chekov’s picture of a HDMI to USB-C cable

Payton Johnson

okay but the 2 drink minimum @ the atlanta show + my weed pen + delays is why my roomie and i were blasted when we met you two lovely ladies❤️ apologies from 2 atl binchies

alexa schnur

i ❤️ my exposure and responstresses

Eliza Fausset
>>116060002

this is kind of an insane thing to say. why would the norcross venue have been better because it’s not in the center of the city?

Sabrina Martin

SHE LET ME HIDE MY WEED IN HER TIDDIE

Julia

As another Julia with a mosquito-bite-allergy.... Julia why aren't you spraying yourself off 5 times per day BEFORE you get bit 😭😭 also, you should always carry an antimosquito plug with you at the hotel it's a LIFE SAVER

Julia
>>116135946

Hahaha yeah I think this has taught them a lesson to have all of their equipment and NEVER rely on a venue

Sedona Steffens

JULIA how long were u on zoloft? Im on it now and it has definitely helped with my OCD/intrusive thoughts, but I’m tired of paying for it lol I’m just wondering how long i should stay on it for it to have lasting effects

Kaylinn
>>116390138

im on 50mg zoloft for OCD and didnt really feel it helped anything til like 2 months? google says 4-6 weeks tho

Sedona Steffens
>>116390138

Oh i’ve been on it for two years lol i meant that julia made it sound like she stopped taking it and it helped long term

Claire Brudner

BOOTS are truly always so hard to remove even when they fit perfectly- as a TX girlie having someone remove ur boots for you is one of the most romantic things a person can do

Chloe Allen

binchies u shld totally do an episode about the history of heels

Hannah Garber

PLS my binch queens look into “8 passengers” they were a utah mormon family vlog channel for YEARS and the mom just got arrested for aggravated child abuse and is currently being held without bail because one of their kids snuck over to the neighbors house !!!!!!!!!!! it’s actually horribly sad :( and all coming out in real time :( but the story and history of the family is insane my jaw and stomach were respectfully DROPPING. sorry for my run on sentences im high af!!!!!!!!!!!!

Megann Mozden

i took zoloft for 7 years, and i felt like i literally slept through those entire 7 years. i guess you can’t have anxious intrusive thoughts if you’re unconscious!!!!

Hannah

Queens I’m lost on a run right now…this is the only thing keeping me sane bc idk where I am

Claudia

Please girlies, title your episode files so that when I download them into Spotify they're not all called bonusepfinal1 😭

Nathalie Bessette

Can you guys find a way to legally disparage the ATL venue and tell no one to ever book or attend a show there ever?? I’m indignant and karening out rn

Ashlynn Long

as a texan who was forced many times to shop in a boot barn, your story made me CACKLE

freya
>>116047362

it may be because they need different chords depending on the different tech the venues have? not sure tho lol

Emily Schmidt

So late to this party but Eliza I am such a type B person EXCEPT when it comes to my health and weather. You are not alone my zen baddie but please send help to us gorls if you seek it…

Sam Haimowitz

the amount of times the word “boot” was said during this episode is so KAJSKSFJFJFJDJFJJF

Mac McAree

this episode is so fucking funny your trials and tribulations are not in vain. love listening to the bonus eps like i’m listening to my silly besties recap a trip to nashville

Lily Ana Verna

SO MUCH LOVE FOR THE ATLANTA BINCHIES!!

Lily Ana Verna

Eliza I relate so much I also go down sooo many rabbit holes of seeking information that I know will just scare me more :( love to see it! And I KNOW I'm supposed to just ~sit with the uncertainty~ and not give in to the compulsions but it's really hard!

Lily Ana Verna
>>133746233

Health and weather are also huge ones for me! And also kidnappings/disappearances/cold cases ... yikes

bre

i just gotta say this is one of my most favourite bonus eps ever not to clown on your tribulations but it’s soooo funny every time

flannery

nothing has gagged me more on this show than y'all saying my name (Flannery) randomly in this episode???? i was just in the midst of the boots cackling when you name drop me violently i'm now soooo curious about what "FLANNERYS" is??? anyways loved the ep as always