THE WEREWOLF OF THE USO - episode 11 (Patreon)

THE WEREWOLF OF THE USO - episode 11

STEAM WHISTLE OF A BOAT

SOUND OF WAVES AND SEAGULLS

ANNOUNCER Set sail for Excitement
Set sail for intrigue
Adventure is on the Horizon!

ANNOUNCER The Werewolf of the USO, episode 11

SHIP’S BELL RINGS - 6 BELLS 7PM

ANNOUNCER Tragedy has struck – twice! [slight pause] At the Rampart Pictures film encampment, starlet Joanette Ferrell has been murdered – though only a select few are aware of it. Even fewer people are aware that, in the hotel room Duke and Bertie share with Mac, another dead woman has turned up! Rather than heading for a resolution, the mystery seems to be spreading!

MUSIC SWELLS

SCENE 1. TRAILER, WITH MAC

SOUND SOMEONE WALKING OUTSIDE

MAC [quietly, musing] Returning to the scene of the crime, eh?

SOUND DOORKNOB RATTLES

WELLS [weak pleading whisper, outside] Joanette?

MAC [to self] Well, that doesn’t sound too dangerous.

SOUND MAC TAKES A COUPLE OF QUIET STEPS, FLINGS OPEN THE DOOR

WELLS [terrified squeal]

SOUND MAC GRABS HIM AND PULLS HIM IN

MAC Talk to me, Wells.

SOUND SHUTS DOOR

WELLS I- I- …can’t. I just-- [breaks down in ugly tears, really]

MAC [unsettled] Uh…. Oh.

MUSIC

SCENE 2. COTTAGE

DARLENE Give me that picture, Rose. I’ll beg if I have to.

ROSE [a bit harsh] It’s an interesting snap, Darlene. I showed it to Kal, a local, and he says that the tree in the picture would only flower like this several months ago.  But Rampart’s been here for just a couple of weeks..?

DARLENE Olivia--?

OLIVIA I can leave, if you want, Darlene, but I swear I won’t hold anything against you. I know actresses’re supposed to be catty and out to get each other, but I’ve never seen the point.

DARLENE No, you haven’t, have you? [sighs] It’s hard to know who to trust, in an industry that specializes in falsehoods.

ROSE [sincere] Trust me.

DARLENE What about him?

ROSE Oh! Zorion won’t say anything, either.

ZORION I understand none of this.

ROSE See?

DARLENE [sigh] It was supposed to be … artistic. Tasteful. Classy, even. I needed the money to book my passage to California – to Hollywood.

ROSE And they--?

DARLENE “Specialized in falsehood,” of course. No wonder they paid so well. They knew they would make back every penny.

OLIVIA Blackmail?

DARLENE You said a mouthful, sister.

MUSIC

SCENE 3. TRAILER

WELLS [crying] Can we please talk somewhere else, Mr. MacDougall? I can’t bear seeing her …like that.

MAC Joanette? [pointed] Your employer’s fiancée?

WELLS [quiet, sniffling] Yes.

MAC Mm. [sympathetic] You loved her?

WELLS [after a pause]  Yes. [defensive] And she loved me.

MAC Was Oscar aware of this?

WELLS [less teary] He didn’t – [sharp, sudden] Wait, are you thinking that he --?

MAC It’s been known to happen.

WELLS [dismissive] You don’t understand Hollywood, Mr. MacDougall. He knew Joanette was marrying him to forward her career. It was no secret. Once she’s [faltering] – or if she ever was… [sniffles]

MAC Keep talking. Anything you can tell me may help me catch the fiend who did this.

WELLS [long breath] Once she was established, they could divorce and stay friends. It happens all the time.

MAC And then she would marry you?

WELLS Oh, don’t be silly – I’ve nothing to offer her career. [sliding back into tears] But I could have... always been there for her.

MUSIC

SCENE 4. COTTAGE

ROSE Was it just photos, or were there films, too?

DARLENE No. No. I wouldn’t do that. They said it was for a collector in Thailand or something, and no one else would ever see any films, but I … I wasn’t that desperate.

OLIVIA You dodged a bullet there.

DARLENE They still have me over the proverbial barrel.

OLIVIA [realizing] Was thatthe packet you had with you in the costume tent?

DARLENE Uh-huh. [sharp] That’s who you need to talk to. That witch Ancy. She’s part of the gang, or whatever they are. I had to hand over cash to her every week. She claimed she was just passing things along, but I never believed it.

MUSIC

SCENE 5. OUTSIDE RAMPART’S GATE

SOUND CAR DRIVES OFF

BERTIE Come on Duke. Let’s find Mac. Carson said he would meet us here once the photos are ready. I’m hoping he can get Doctor Lo in to look over the body as well, but that may be too much to expect at such short notice.

DUKE I can’t help but worry, Bertie!  What if that body got something to do with me being bit by a wolf man. She was all torn up like an animal done it!

BERTIE That’s why I want Doctor Lo to look her over, since he already knows what your so-called bite looks like.

DUKE Before or after we turn ourselves in to the police?

BERTIE It should be obvious we had nothing to do with it. She was left in our room while we were away all day.

DUKE …at an underworld hangout. I’m dead sure that’s the best alibi anybody ever had.

BERTIE [sigh] Someone at the hotel must have seen something. After all, the killer needed to find out which was our room.

DUKE You got something there! Ain’t like to be there by accident, what with the biting and all.

BERTIE Right. Let’s check the trailer first. Mac might still be there.

MUSIC

SCENE 6. COTTAGE

OLIVIA Have you heard what happened to Joanette?

ROSE What?

OLIVIA Oscar said she was hurt and taken to the hospital.

DARLENE I caught Joanette searching in the trailer the other day.

ROSE Searching for what?

DARLENE Her script, she said.  [suddenly worried] Oh goodness! I might have gotten myself in deep trouble!

OLIVIA Why?

DARLENE I thought it was just some silly whim of hers, and I was bored, so I starting asking everyone about scripts, too.

OLIVIA Why didn’t she just ask Maisie? [to Rose, explaining] Our script girl.

DARLENE She was being evasive, but said it was her original script she was looking for.

ROSE [quiet awe] “Uncover the original!”

DARLENE She said she’d made a note on it and wanted to find it, but I never bought that.

OLIVIA [dawning] You were asking about that in wardrobe! Well, if there’s anything exciting about the original version, I’ve still got mine handy.

ROSE Show me!

MUSIC

SCENE 7. OUTSIDE THE TRAILER

SOUND BERTIE AND DUKE APPROACH

BERTIE No sign anyone’s in the trailer --

SOUND OSCAR COMES UP FROM ANOTHER DIRECTION

OSCAR There you are! It’s getting dark, and no one really feels safe tonight. Where’s your boss?

DUKE You mean Mac?

OSCAR I need to bring him up to date on a few things that have happened…

BERTIE We need him for the same reason, Mr. Oscar. He told us to meet him here.

DUKE We’ve had a few “adventures” ourselves.

OSCAR I’m tying myself in knots to keep it together for the cast and crew – [sounds choked up] and finish the film, no matter what.

BERTIE Something drastic has happened, hasn’t it?

SOUND TRAILER DOOR OPENS

MAC You could say that.

SOUND HE STEPS OUT AND SHUTS THE DOOR

MAC Oscar, where’s a good place to get a few people together? Someplace we can be sure there won’t be eavesdroppers.

OSCAR The cottage, I guess. It might be a bit crowded, but at least it’s got walls.

BERTIE Oh dear – we know thatlook.

DUKE Mac shore enough got the answer again, ain’t he?

BERTIE One of the answers, anyway. That’s the problem, when you have more than one question.

MAC Have thesepeople meet us in the cottage in half an hour.

SOUND FOLDED PAPER HANDED OVER

MUSIC

SCENE 8. COTTAGE

SOUND RATTLE OF SCRIPT PAPERS

OLIVIA Does that help?

ROSE It means something, but I don’t really know what. Yet. Do you know anything about the writer credited here?

DARLENE [no] Uh-uh. We almost never even meet the writers.

OLIVIA And scripts get rewritten all the time. Sometimes time after time. It’s not something we typically pay any attention to.

SOUND KNOCK ON DOOR

MAC [outside] Rose?

SOUND ROSE OPENS DOOR, LETS HIM IN

ROSE Mac! You really want to see this!

MAC Hold that thought. I’m having a few people meet here in half an hour. You ladies need to be ready for company.

MUSIC

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SOUND MUSIC TURNS DARK

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SOUND MUSIC BRIGHTENS

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SCENE 9. COTTAGE, A HALF HOUR LATER

SOUND CROWD MURMURS, SOMEONE COUGHS

[note: crowd is Oscar, Wells, Antoine, Olivia, Darlene, Monteith, Duke, Bertie, Zorion, Rose]

MAC Thank you all for coming here.

OSCAR We’re happy to, seeing as how you’re going to make all our problems go away.

MAC It may not be so simple. [to all] You see, Oscar here brought us in to look into couple of crimes, the first being a theft of film stock, which we’re pretty sure we’ve got resolved.

BERTIE Or will have, shortly.

MAC The other was a series of oddly ominous notes, aimed at Oscar.

ROSE More like weird poems than threats. Strange surreal imagery.

OSCAR They were unsettling, that’s for sure.

MAC As far as we could figure, that’s all they were intended to do – unsettle Oscar. No one else ever saw them. Surely if the point was to upset or disturb the crew, they would have been made public - posted somewhere, rather than handed in with Oscar’s mail.

OSCAR Targeting me, just like I thought. Some crazy, talking nonsense.

MAC I agree there was no specific meaning to them. But people – even crazy people – don’t do things without some kind of reason.

ANTOINE By definition, crazy people have not le raison, n’est pas?

MONTEITH Don’t be a fool, Antoine. As an award-winning actor, I have portrayed some of the classics, and there is always an underlying logic to explain the motivations of both heroes and villains.

OLIVIA [undertone] When the writer bothers to include such depth.

MAC Precisely. Everyone wants things. And the key is often figuring out what that thing is. In this case, someone apparently wanted to make Oscar’s life difficult.

BERTIE Perhaps even unbearable.

OSCAR Why? People like me. Ask anyone here. Girls?

DARLENE Apart from calling us “girls” all the time, Oscar’s not a bad sort.

OLIVIA I’ve certainly worked with worse.

OSCAR [dry] Gee thanks.

OLIVIA This is a moment for truth, Oscar, not flattery.

MAC And what about people you steal credit from?

OSCAR Are you accusing meof something?

DUKE Well, old son, you may say it ain’t nothing for writers to get changed on movie scripts all the time, but maybe it ain’t just nothing to them writers.

OSCAR It’s the industry. No one wants a huge list of writers, re-writers, and all the other names on a screenplay. They want a famous name that people can recognize. Everyone gets paid. Some.

MAC So this screenplay has your name on it, now. But originally?

OSCAR [evasive] I- I don’t even recall.

SOUND MAC PULLS OUT A SCRIPT

MAC I have a copy of the original script for Nightingales Three right here.

OLIVIA Don’t forget - I’m going to want that back, for my memoirs.

MAC I promise.

OLIVIA Especially after all this.

MAC But right here on page one, is a name – Tony Shoemaker.

ROSE [realizing!] Shoe—

MAC [cutting her off, quickly] Is there a Tony Shoemaker in the room?

SOUND BREATHLESS SILENCE

BERTIE Of course!

EVERYONE [quizzical murmurs]

OSCAR [offended] What do you mean, “of course!”

ANTOINE [deliberately changing the subject] Do we not ‘ave more important zings to discuss zan some mere industry dispute? ‘Ave you not uncovered yet the source and meaning of zose poisson [yes, “poisson”] pen letters?

BERTIE Out of curiosity, where in France are you from, M’sieu Antoine?

ANTOINE Surely zis is not ze time to-- Well, if you must inquire, I am originally from Quebec. In Canada. [mispronounces "Quebec"]

BERTIE [concerned] Oh, dear. Mac?

MAC What?

BERTIE [quiet] I was banking rather a lot on Antoine’s accent being false, but I’m hardly familiar with the Canadian variety.

MAC [quiet] Good try. [up, to everyone] The script, even the mysterious notes, are inconsequential compared to what happened today. A woman was murdered.

EVERYONE [shocked]!

OSCAR [hinting, trying to keep his secret] No!

WELLS [breaks into tears]

DARLENE Who?

OLIVIA [realizing] Oh, no.

MONTEITH [muttered] I certainly had nothing to do with it.

OSCAR No. [commanding]  We’re not going there, Mac.

MAC Shush. Everyone, please.

EVERYONE [shush]

WELLS [sniffles]

MAC We can’t avoid it, Oscar. There’s no other way to move forward.

OSCAR [pause, then] Fine. So I lied. Joanette is dead.

EVERYONE [shocked again!]

MUSIC

SCENE 10. CARSON’S HOTEL ROOM, SET UP AS A DARKROOM

SOUND LIQUID MOVING – DEVELOPER TRAYS FOR PHOTOS

CARSON [musing as he looks over the photos] Doggone mess. Even in black and white, it’s a massacre. Wouldn’t print it in the sheets - too graphic.  Maybe True Crime, though. Hmm.

SOUND SWISHING WATER

CARSON Why such effort? Surely one or two stabs would do it. The words “ripped to shreds” come to mind, and I ain't no fainting aunt Nellie.

SOUND CLIPPING WET PHOTOS TO A LINE

MUSIC

SCENE 11. COTTAGE, CONTINUED

MAC I can see by your faces that some of you already suspected something. Oscar?

OSCAR Obviously, I’m the one who found her. But no one but Antoine and I should be in the know. He was with me in the trailer.

MAC Only you two? Hmm. We’ll get back to that.

ANTOINE [eager] So you ‘ave seen ze body? Were zere any clues?

MAC Plenty. Setting aside the notes and the stolen films, and just looking at the scene of the crime, I spotted a few things.

ANTOINE Zen you can tell us what was in ‘er ‘and?

MAC Hmm?

ANTOINE I could not see what c’est bon, but did regard somezing of gold shining in her clasp-ed ‘and. What was it?

MAC Did you see this too, Oscar?

OSCAR I was a little preoccupied with her [breaking up a bit] just …being …dead [gets himself together] to notice, but I can’t say there wasn’t something.

DUKE Didya check, Mac?

MAC I checked everything. [waits for suspense] She had nothing in her hand when she died.

ANTOINE [slight sputter, quickly stifled]

ROSE Someone tampered with the evidence?

BERTIE I say, Mac, that must mean someone was in the trailer between when they found her, and when you arrived!

MAC I’m not prepared to jump to conclusions, yet.

ANTOINE Are you calling me ze liar? I know what I saw! It was gold, smallish like a button, and it was in ‘er ’and!

MAC I’m not calling your memory into question, Antoine, just stating the facts as I see them.

ANTOINE So? Zen why is it your facts are not ze identical to my facts?

MAC Either we each have information that the other does not. OR—

SOUND PAUSE FOR STARE DOWN

ROSE [nudging] Or?

MAC Or one of us is a liar.

MUSIC

SCENE 12. CARSON’S ROOM, SET UP AS A DARKROOM

SOUND TIMER CLICKING, GOES OFF

SOUND SWISHING A PHOTO IN A PAN

CARSON Mac’ll sure get a kick in the pants from this.

SOUND PHONE RINGING IN ANOTHER ROOM, KEEPS GOING

CARSON Just a sec.

SOUND PHOTO OUT OF LIQUID, CLIPS IT

SOUND FABRIC OF CURTAIN MOVING

CARSON I’m coming, I’m coming!

SOUND DOOR OPENS, HE SLIPS THROUGH

SOUND RINGING PHONE IS LOUDER

CARSON Keep your pants on.

SOUND PICKS UP PHONE

CARSON Carson here.

SOUND UNHEARD VOICE ON PHONE – MA MAMAM AMMAM

CARSON Gotcha. I’ll let him know.

SOUND URGENT POUNDING KNOCK ON HOTEL ROOM DOOR

CARSON [startled] ahh! [to phone] Gotta go. Someone’s at the door.

SOUND HANGS UP PHONE

SOUND ANOTHER POUNDING KNOCK

CARSON You keep your pants on, too. What’s wrong this time?

MUSIC TO CLOSING

ANNOUNCER A lost piece of vital evidence, and Mac hasn’t leapt on the trail? Who is the original writer, Tony Shoemaker, and why does his name sound so familiar? And who is about to burst in on Carson, last seen taking photos in a hotel room that hides a particularly gruesome murder scene?

END