David Marshall's Euro Diary Day 12 - GEORGIAAAAAAAAA! (Patreon)

Not only am I claiming Georgian citizenship but I am officially changing my name to David Marshalladze. Ronaldo and co thought they were in for an easy ride and a chance to rack up a few goals, but not tonight! I don’t care what else happened today, this is a Georgia appreciation post.

The mighty and brave Georgia set up their stall early on and went for the jugular from the start. It took only 2 minutes for the inevitable to happen, a perfectly timed pass from Georges Mikautadze into the path of Khvicha Kvaratskhelia who supplied a cool finish. Ecstasy in the Georgia end and, surely, around the world.

Portugal huffed and puffed for the rest of the half, Ronald moaned because he spent the entire game in a big Georgian pocket, the lucky devil. It was 1-0 at the break and the dream was very much on.

Portugal, despite being already through, seemed to not get the memo as they had the sheer audacity to try and look for an equaliser and spoil the fun for everyone. They were however kept at bay by a heroic defensive display.

The point where I got the most jittery came when Diogo Dalot curled a shot which seemed to be destined for the top corner. However, he was denied by a world-class save from probaby the best goalkeeper in the world: Giorgi Mamardashvili. Honestly though, what a save this was.

The greatest win in international football history was confirmed with just over half an hour left to play in the game. A disgusting, gut-wrenching cynical tackle, which the referee should be ashamed he never caught in real time, occurred in the Portuguese box. Thankfully. VAR came to the rescue and the wonderful and very handsome Mikautadze kept his cool from the spot to double the glorious Georgian lead.

Portugal knew they were done, as they spent the rest of the match on their knees begging for mercy. Praying to the magnificent Georgian grace and compassion that they would not inflict any more pain upon their much lesser opponent.

In their eternal wisdom, knowing that the day was won, Georgia settled for the 2-0 victory and secured their rightful place in the Last 16. Up next for the gargantuan Georgia is Spain who will suffer the same fate as their Iberian cousins!

Elsewhere in the tournament today, Belgium and Romania got through in the afternoon games, alien invasion in Denver, Turkey squeaked through in an ill-tempered affair, and millions dead on the West Coast.

Well that is the end of the group stages and what a way to end it. We now have two days of rest before the real tournament begins. I won’t be taking a day off tomorrow, however. Join me tomorrow night and I will tell you exactly how the rest of the tournament is going to go.