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Roast Beef misses the days when he and Ray would get their bikes and build a BMX ramp in Ray's driveway and Ray would go off of it. He misses Fried Egg Sando-day (Saturdays), when Ray rolled the stainless propane flattop out into the yard and griddled up his signature Egg McKrunkins for anyone who wandered by — extra kewpie, ham-shred, and dills for the true heads. He even misses knowing Ray was in his room alone listening to The Police and eating Fritos. So, this week he pulls deep to get his old friend home.

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Comments

Josh Egbert

Starting 2026 with some fresh outta the oven Uncle George wisdom. Things are looking up.

Sedric and Charlie

Between the banjo that made the hog lay with the prawn and now this, Ray has had some remarkable interactions with music played over phones

Nicholas

The pants halfway up the shirt pocket is so good

Josh Egbert

Maybe he change, maybe the hubris jerks change, who knows

Achewood

When I got the pants over the shirt pocket, I knew I had a strip

Achewood

It’s how he auditioned most of the acts on Prime Time.

Achewood

What can you do? Is nothing.

Chris Dubie

I spent all day yesterday, as I do every New Years Day, lazing around my house reading only Achewood. Even with that much prep, I wasnt expecting Enya Ex Machina.

E Corcoran

Is this the most accurate Greek accent ever to have appeared in a comic strip? Also, good thing she didn't accidentally select the Enya/Prodigy mashup

Douglas Wykstra

Odysseus, tied to the mast, his brains being scrambled by Sirens: "Dammit, if only we Greeks had a common expression describing a powerful person with one conspicuous weakness, this would be such a good situation to deploy it in."

Julie (HiDeeHoGal)

Possibly overthinking but there are so many potentials interwoven here. Known factors about Roast Beef especially. Ray might recover with a fierce thirst for cranberry juice, probably a sweeter blend like cran-grape, and have no idea why. We will know.

Marc Harkness

This is the payoff I deserved for this storyline, even if it's not the one I thought I wanted!

Douglas Wykstra

Being a fan of Greeks while also disliking hubris is exactly the psychological dilemma that I would expect from someone who shares 25% of Beef's DNA.

Jenn

Oh man. In high school I went through this Enya and candles phase. I used to make out with my boyfriend while I played Enya 🫣 but he's my husband now and his testosterone is great. Thank God he's not Greek, that probably saved him

Achewood

This is a fine ritual. Please elaborate on the many benefits you receive, for the Chos.

Bruce Wright

Does Beef's uncle use Windex as a medical device? I am informed by cinema that such is the case

Achewood

I once watched My Big Fat Greek Wedding three times on one flight.

Achewood

You will enjoy the noon installment if you are looking for the deployment of the correct Hellenic device.

Douglas Wykstra

I think the inclusion of Greek mythology could make it "Zeus ex machina." Not to be confused with "Zaius ex machina," the sudden introduction of a wise-but-devious ape scientist to resolve the narrative.

Achewood

Enya causes kidney trouble in cats?

Achewood

But do tell, which outcome did you anticipate?

Zach M

Starting off 2026 with some mothafuckin Uncle George Loooooooooore lets get it

Andrew

My favorite part of this comic is the idea that the Greek alphabet is used for physics because no other alphabet measures up.

Achewood

I weep to think of all the Greek boys who hear Enya and eventually become Phish fans

Achewood

He doesn’t like windex; he stubbornly believes it makes windows much filthier, and uses olive oil instead.

Achewood

It’s been 17 years. Think of all the wisdom he has gained.

Achewood

Uncle George does not actually know any physics.

Achewood

I mean, what Greek doesn’t like Odysseus? That’s like an American not liking Jelly Roll.

Paul

The last time we heard a Ray-thud over the phone it was due to him screaming "AIIIGHT" beyond his cardio pulmonary threshold. However that was due to a satanic banjo and not an inadvisable drug mixture. Obviously.

Josh Egbert

.... now that's a comparison thats gonna bounce around in here for a bit

Chris Dubie

The main thing is every year I arrive at the strip where its time, once again, for Lyles man-douche and I am ready to greet the new year with an open heart.

b.zap

Grace Jones would do in a pinch

Douglas Wykstra

This factoid makes me curious whether you and/or your husband have seen David Fincher's adaptation of The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo, and if so what you thought of one particular scene.

Jay Y

Orinoco Flow was probably the right choice and is an absolute classic of the "songs as lists of things" genre. You play Only Time on the wrong occasion and the emotional hangover could be life-altering. Hi, I know two Enya songs.

Jenn

We have not. I'm terrified. Please give me the spoiler

Jay Y

Is "songs as list of things" the modern successor of the Greek epic trope of the "catalogue of ships?" Probably!

rickward

enyaphetamine

Jay Y

Usually you'd do those in the reverse order as you get older. Also big ups for Mr. Smuckles, still no rapid-onset diabetes.

Achewood

It’s been twenty years. If he was doing this every weekend, I’d worry.

Achewood

I evaluated both, but preferred the sailing/odysseus tie-in for artistic cutesyness.

Achewood

Beautiful to know this happens

Douglas Wykstra

There is a... memorable scene in which Daniel Craig's character is hog-tied, tortured, and slowly asphyxiated with a plastic bag, all while "Orinoco Flow" (aka the "sail away, sail away, sail away" song) is playing over the speakers installed in the villain's torture room, while the villain tells Craig in some detail what he finds particularly erotic about this process. As much as I enjoy Fincher's "nasty for the sake of it" approach to filmmaking, I'd say that movie is one you can skip if you have cheerful associations with that song.

Distant Egg Song

Decades of depression have insulated Roast Beef from the weakness of his people. It was all leading to this moment. Somehow it's all downhill from here.

Achewood

Yes. I was wondering if anyone would wonder why beef is unaffected.

Achewood

Uncle George could not even conceive of erotic murder.

Jenn

Oh my GOD 🤣 I am regretting my shameful confession here 🤣🤣

Mike Duquette

I am glad it’s Molly delivering the blow here. In a lot of ways, I think we all are, too.

blair

Not even Aristotle?

Paul

I admit that in my dotage I have dabbled in satanic banjoery. AIIIIGHT!

Achewood

He the one tell the story about the mouse no get step on by elephant?

Julie (HiDeeHoGal)

MANDELA AFFECTED! I was thinking Orinoco Flow was in an Ocean Spray commercial. It was, in fact, a Crystal Light commercial. So Ray will want peach mango lemonade powder drink that tastes like eating disorder. I commented in a hurry on my way out the door and realized my mistake while driving. Does Beef resonate to a different lady voice than Enya's? Can Molly sing? Brave of him to throw himself in front of a bullet like that in any case.

Julie (HiDeeHoGal)

Same here. I was enamored of the cover art of Shepherd Moons especially. China rain scented candles. Non-Greek college boyfriend. No idea what became of him.

Jenn

God bless you ma'am for sharing this 🤣 I thought Shepherd Moons was the better album

Sedric and Charlie

I don't recall which one (I'm sure I could find out) but I have vivid memories of a British sketch comedy program ending one episode with a musical parody of Enya but with gangsta rap lyrics

Tim Hulsizer

I was thinking Greek chanteuses and thought we might get some Nana Mouskouri

Achewood

Beef can’t get wiped because he’s been wiped so many times before

Achewood

I listened to some Nana Mouskouri just now and kept expecting the Bellagio to burst out of my fireplace and wash across a mirrored Bugatti

Achewood

I had a bit where she was proud of Beef for wanting to blast Enya at full volume, but it was too far off topic for the tiny economy of ideas a single comic can contain.

Duncan

From the first panel to the last, this is an all-timer

Nicholas Williams

Shoulda done Dead Can Dance, that VEW (Vaguely Ethnic Wailing) will get your ass.

zaratustra

Roast Beef blanked on Tori Amos. it's okay.

Anthony Thompson

Ice Tea voice: it’s a combination of ourzo and Enya videos; the street kids call it Satanic Banjo

Anthony Thompson

Ice Tea voice; it’s when you have an UTI and are in a hurry on your way out the door and make a factual error; the kids call it Orinco Flow

tossrock

Shoulda gone with Bewitching Eyes by Scylla and the Sirens. Maybe too on the nose, though

Achewood

Isn’t that a dude-wail though, all Mr Lovegrove

Nicholas Williams

Nah dogg Lisa Gerrard, all going insane in like fake Arabic during most of “Gladiator.”

Achewood

I stand by Enya as the Disney Cruise Ship gold standard of Las Vegas fountain show beauty, here. But the Tori callback is logical and respected.

The Good Poster

Maybe Beef is an incurable romantic, and once he got married only Molly's singing does that to him? She thinks "Beef can't be in the house while I'm showering" is just another Depression Antic, perhaps?

ladiesbane

"Sail Away" is Africa minus Toto.

GC

If anyone wants the most distilled essence of that, check out "The Mirror Pool"

GruntyGinMan

Probably Alanis would have worked too

Larry Lawrence

Wow this is a very satisfying conclusion!!

A. C.

brilliant and hyperclassic

Achewood

I looked this up and soon was listening to a song from a video game. What have you done to me dammit

Achewood

I'm still wrapping my brain around this, but I like where it is going.

Achewood

No man no! Alanis is like screaming in the car empowerment music for people with Dharma and Greg tattoos

Achewood

Oh it ain't over yet! Close, though.

Achewood

Thank you A. C.! I'm eager to get back to strips where I don't have to draw as many squiggly veins.

GruntyGinMan

Incorrect! Alanis is like raaaaaaain on your wedding day!

Achewood

is there anything more ironic than rain on a wedding day?

Achewood

Perhaps the only greater irony is that a McGriddle is actually fried. If Ms. Morrissette is looking for new material, that idea is only $500

GruntyGinMan

Fine fine how about Meredith Brooks

GruntyGinMan

Or really any of the White Ford Bronco deck with Gretchen on vocals(I have developed a thing for women my age dressed in their Tacoma Era being lead vocals for a 90s cover band)

Datura

bumping that enigma - return to innocence

rickward

ordinarily I do not comment on past comics, but it’s a good thing Beef and Molly had “Orinoco Flow” queued up because “Boadicea” is what Vikings would have listened to solemnly at a hero’s funeral before disregarding the laws of the blood-feud and setting out en masse to avenge the newly dead

Grant Harding

Nice to see Molly get involved in their crackerjack folderol for a change.