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Take the Quiz!

Take the quiz, then come back and complain or brag! This is a popular post-quiz group activity, and probably the busiest this board gets. I'd say this week's installment is medium-hard, but I'm historically wrong about this.

Also! I believe I've set this week's quiz up so that you can see everybody's results, not just your own. Some people love data, so that is fun for them. I used to work with a data-loving guy who took the bus home every night and used Google Street View to click down every street in America. He allegedly had clicked through every mile the Google car ever drove. You'd think Google would have a ceremony for something like that, but no, I don't think they wanted anything to do with a person who acted that way. He was a wonky cat, I hope he's okay these days.

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Comments

Josh Egbert

I really enjoy these, despite forever remaining a C student

Achewood

The reference material is always free, and soon to be getting an image resolution upgrade, so rereading can be less painful!

Achewood

No you're not! The scoring scheme expressly indicates that you are "Believable."

GH

7/10. The perfect score for someone who pays attention in life without becoming uncomfortably obsessive. People want to be on my trivia team at bars because I know some answers without being so competitive that I make the whole thing a chore for everyone.

Jordan D Cowman

10 10. I hope you know that all of my friends are sick of hearing me say "now THAT's pussy shaving music" whenever we come across a herb alpert album.

Achewood

I'm not sure those are really friends, then. Nice work!

Achewood

Nicely done. Yeah, nobody likes the trivia contestant who slams the table with both hands when they get one wrong, or the guy who has to take a steam-walk when another team wins.

DKB

I'm a 4/10. An oldhead but admittedly rusty, I guessed on each question therefore I feel pretty good about the outcome. Feels just like high school. Which is what I was attending when Achewood started.

Daniel M Ford

6/10. Just like middle school math. I’ll have to put myself on punishment though since my dad isn’t here to tell me I’m lazy.

Julie (HiDeeHoGal)

I got a 7. This one was hard! But maybe you caught me on a bad brain day.

Andrew Reynolds

10/10 I did struggle a little with the bachelor party organizer.

Ryan Boyle

30% correct because of 100% guessing. I came to Achewood somewhat late, circa 2009, binge-read all the archives, and the details didn't stick.

Achewood

Achewood is the spiritual home of all people who did just enough to leave high school without really remembering what the Battle of Appomattox was.

Achewood

I feel like that's the score Ray would get on a test of his own life, so you are in good (?) company.

Jake McIntyre

9/10, because (A) perfection is a foolish quest, and (B) I have to admit that I did not find the "Rehab Ray" arc to be my kind of chuckle, and haven't revisted it in some time.

Achewood

It was the aquarium pendant wasn't it.

Achewood

I'm hearing a lot of excuses here Ryan! Several people who scored the same as you have been with me since the beginning, and I don't hear THEM giving reasons.

Distant Egg Song

10/10. Guessed on Lyle's cologne and nearly got the wrong answer on the board game on account of forgetting that there were multiple ways Beef imagined people dying during that game.

Achewood

That arc was me working some stuff out during a, shall we say, post-rehab period, so I very much get that it didn't feel like the rest of the run. Nice work!

A. Hamster

8/10. It’s a nice score that says I paid attention in class but didn’t lose any Saturdays to exam prep

Achewood

Good call on remembering the second method of assassination mentioned in the marriage board game!

Ryan Boyle

Knucklehead since small times (derogatory)

Achewood

No egghead in this ghetto! Stylish score.

A. Hamster

I know better. In any growing up in the hood movie, the guy with prospects is always the first one to get drive-by’d

Andrew Groves

9/10, got the wrong gang on the bachelor party wipeout

Julie (HiDeeHoGal)

No actually. It was Vegetable Head, who shot the bachelor party, and sex math quilt. Pat would demonstrate his vocabulary at any opportunity, also he is an asshole.

b.zap

8/10

A. Hamster

Cue *NSYNC “Drive By By By”

Achewood

[prayer hands emoji] Namaste

Achewood

To be fair, both were mentioned, but only one in reference to the bachelor party

Achewood

Tall poppy syndrome, they call it. Keep your head down, catch a bus to the sunset.

Achewood

ah, the seldom-invoked derogatory tense of the phrase

Spyguitar

9/10, missed Ray’s pissin’ theme. One educated guess but the rest were all brain tape

Achewood

Clearly you need a night out with Ray and the fellas. You'd never miss that one again, after hearing it five or six times every hour.

Matt Mitchell

9/10 dammit. Talked myself out of “Probationary Icthyologist” as being from a different part of the strip.

Julie (HiDeeHoGal)

Did you know Herb Alpert developed and promoted a perfume called "Listen?" It's true. It had a neat design on the box..

Achewood

Don't worry, you're not a Probationary Chochacho.

Matt Mitchell

One of the nicer things one could say to a guy.

Matt Mitchell

Also, the Herb Alpert line sticks as especially funny after having played Herb Alpert charts on my one cruise ship gig 30 years ago.

Zen Window

Hi, it's me, scored three-is-the-magic-number, still happy that my enjoyment of cartoon cats hasn't displaced knowledge of my children's birthdays.

Achewood

The stateroom shower drains must have been so clogged after your set

Traedran

Alright, a flawless score. The one about sex positions was the hardest, it being sometime since I've read the relevant strip. Hooray, lucky guesses.

Achewood

But the brain is infinite, as Ray demonstrated in Ramathustra Ron's Bathtub of Touches

Achewood

oh my god I just learned he's still alive

Achewood

When In Doubt, Missionary It Out —old sex saying

Andrew Groves

I know, I’m much chagrined. I didn’t even read the question, and picked the limo exploders.

Achewood

Short and sweet, fun to write too

Traedran

I can tell you from experience, there are some situations involving doubt where this is not the solution, like remembering right-on-red. No one appreciated my efforts, or technique.

Achewood

Oh you mean like at Arby’s, definitely

Nicholas Williams

Aw yeah who is the man who answered the questions correctly.

Gavin Byrnes

Dang, 5. That was tough! I guess I need to reread some stuff.

Sedric and Charlie

I got a respectable 9 out of ten, I only flubbed Ray's urine jingle

Chris Warren

"Now THAT is pussy shavin' music." (My score was just five, but it was worth it to be reminded of that quote, which has been etched into my brain.)

Achewood

Around here we call that a Rushton

Achewood

Well don’t leave us in suspense Charles van doren

Achewood

Get on it man! I’m erasing the website in ONE HOUR

Achewood

That’s definitely the one to get wrong. Nice work!

Achewood

There were two that no self respecting person gets right, so, excellent!

Achewood

Five is a great pussy-shavin’ score

Travis O.

10/10 THIS! IS! A! HOMEBOY!

Travis O.

When my friend gifted me his old record player, he included Whipped Cream And Other Delights, and I just barely held back from blurting out that exact phrase

Achewood

Travis now you are cursed to blurt that phrase out at the exact _wrong_ time

John Kenda

Back in my crisis work days, I mangled your I will hunt you down like Strawberry the neighborhood ho line about a particularly difficult client, Got asked to “rephrase.” I tried: “Please call rehab or I will pursue you with historically accurate persistence, as enumerated by the Los Angeles rap combo NWA.” which was worse. You could feel HR being invented in real time, somewhere far away, sharpening a pencil.

Evan Tessier

9/10. It's easy to forget which dangerous foreign cartel Roast Beef dreads most. One can imagine almost all of them being the perpetrators of hidden-in-food assassination items (oh shiiiiiiiiit).

Achewood

The first rap lyric I ever heard was about Strawberry the Ho. The kid of a family friend played it on their hifi while the parents were in the back yard. We were incredulous; the Beatles never called anyone a ho. Burl Ives sang of big rock candy mountain, but surely that was just literal.

Achewood

They each have their own style. MS-13 has pupusas spread thickly with C-4. Yakuza has mochi with remote detonators. The Hells Angels have fanny packs with hamburger-shaped rocks that break teeth when bitten, which is among the worst of the criminal gang hidden-in-food terror items.

Amelia Hall

10/10 and "it was like a goddamn genius was drivin' me with a joystick" for that one. Been deep in parental apartment moving as an aspect of elder care these last couple weeks. Your posts have truly been a balm on my bruised person lately, providing brief moments when my anxiety abates.

Achewood

Nice work! That is some double-sided brain tape. Lord do I not look forward to that life transition with my folks. My mom's salt and pepper shaker collection alone will tear our family apart. Very happy to hear this Diversion is a helpful one to you.

Bungus Bronbo

7/10! The hefty heights of "Believable"!

Achewood

An Extremely Believable Chochacho — your honorary title. You get to use it all weekend but have to type it back to me on Monday at 9am in order to return it.

S. J. Sulzer

Eight. I flubbed the hotel execution and the cheese-taint comparison. Getting into crosswords lately has revealed how much of that culture (no pun intended) expects a knowledge about cheese (and wine) that exceeds my modest culinary needs (and teetotal lifestyle.)

Jay Williams

10/10. Had to think for a second about the theme song for Ray’s Urine.

Mystic Eyebrow

9/10. I need to brush up on Ray's urine

Achewood

"I flubbed the cheese-taint comparison." Don't feel bad, SJ. Not about this.

Achewood

[music notes] hell yessss [toilet splash solo]

Achewood

well this certainly got a laugh from me