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February Secular Bonus Poll for Patrons Only (Patreon)

Published:
2023-02-12 21:03:45
Imported:
2026-06

Poll

February Secular Bonus Poll for Patrons Only

  • Blonde 312
  • Disney's Pinocchio 660
  • Good Mourning 172
  • The King's Daughter 140
  • 2023-02-12
  • 1284 votes
{'title': 'February Secular Bonus Poll for Patrons Only ', 'choices': [{'text': 'Blonde', 'votes': 312}, {'text': "Disney's Pinocchio", 'votes': 660}, {'text': 'Good Mourning', 'votes': 172}, {'text': "The King's Daughter", 'votes': 140}], 'closes_at': None, 'created_at': datetime.datetime(2023, 2, 12, 20, 56, 25, tzinfo=datetime.timezone.utc), 'description': None, 'allow_multiple': False, 'total_votes': 1284}

Content

Thanks for your support. As a patron you're getting exclusive access to vote on this month's selection for a secular bonus episode which the gang may or may not decide was democratically chosen... or a rigged poll. 

This month's choices are going to be the current Razzie nominees (excluding Morbius cause we did that one already). 

Vote below for you choice of: 

Blonde              Disney’s PinocchioGood Mourning     The King’s Daughter

Link to Razzie news: https://www.razzies.com/razz-newz.html

Comments

Sam Armstrong

I've seen Good Mourning - 0/10 it convinced me that MGK shouldn't be allowed to make anything anymore

Andrew Campbell

Would have preferred Pauly Shore's Pinocchio, which was also released last year

Lukas Jenewein-Gremer

I have no idea what these movies are about. Except Pinocchio off course. i just let others decide

Dion Parchment

I have a crush on Ana de Armas soooo…blonde…:)

TenaciousB

I have never heard of any of these movies (minus Pinocchio, which I'm assuming is a horrible "update") but I voted anyway because I love chaos.

IngloriousBaxter

I really hope Blonde wins over Pinocchio. Pinocchio sucked but it’s going to be the same criticisms we can levy against all the Disney remakes. It’s soulless, awkward, cynical etc etc. I feel like Blonde is a special kind of monstrosity and I really want to hear these guys rip it apart. It’s a misogynistic hateful anti-choice take down of a woman it’s pretending to care about and further victimizing her through exploitation and diminishing every good she ever accomplished in her life.

One I'd Nick

I have only seen pinocchio, but I just watched the trailers for the others & good mourning makes me want to rip out my eyes and eat them, just so I can vomit them back up. WTF is that garbage!?!? So my vote goes to good mourning.

Vincent Jorgensen

I voted Blonde but it's losing to the biggest loser (in terms of $$) on the list, Pinocchio. I hope it's rigged because Pinocchio isn't going to be nearly as fun as Blonde or Good Mourning would be.

Laura Lusby

I really wanted to watch this with my daughter but I don’t know where it’s streaming

Nytohan

Voted The King's Daughter, because why not mock Pierce Brosnan again? Slight tangent - maybe Lawnmower Man in the future? That one doesn't even have to be a bonus episode, there's some weird religious stuff in there.

Ubiquitous enmity

No one should have to watch that fucking Pinocchio movie 🤮

Ian Fay

Google says it's free on Amazon with ads.

Oxford Comma is Mandatory

I can't tell if Good Mourning is trying to be a self-aware bad movie or just a bad movie, but it looks like it would have the most meat on the bones for the crew.

Nytohan

Looks like it's on Amazon Prime video

Spacesuit Spiff

I know you don't do meta bits, but a review of pinocchio where one of you watched the fruity russian version, one of you watched del toro's, and one of you watched megan...

James Dowmont

this is also why I voted Blonde. even in interviews, you can tell that director hated Monroe. it's so shitty.

Markus Ekedahl

Who the fuck are all these people voting Pinocchio over the "Marilyn Monroe's talking fetus" one?

Rowin Xavier

Need to hear something lifeless torn apart, so while any would do Pinocchio seems the best fit

Troublemaker Jake

Machine gun kelly? Thats gotta be like the 2020's version of Cool as Ice.

Jon

Film written, produced and directed by and starring Machine Gun Kelly. How could I not pick Good Mourning

Matt Eldritch

I'm torn on this one. I've heard that Blonde is exploitive trash produced by a domestic abuser, but I also love to hear you guys tear the Pinocchio remake a new one.

Liz Rosenberg

Pinochio all the way! It's a brilliant but insane movie, and I'd love to hear your take on it. Eli on Jiminy Cricket alone is worth the price of admission.

Aaron Roberto

How am I only just finding out that Disney did a live action remake of Pinocchio?

B. King

Blonde isn't great, but it also doesn't seem like it would make good comedy material. A lot of landmines

MutatedWisdom

A TALKING fetus? Say no more, I'm in.

One I'd Nick

I did not know that! I hate it even more now!

Calvin Lindfors

I came to the comments to post exactly this.

Starshark

God damn that Good Mourning looks like some shit. I feel bad voting for it, if there's a chance you poor bastards will have to watch it.

Mark H

They chose the quintessential Brit (though technically Irish) to play a French king? Weird

Mark H

Tilting at windmills, but I’m voting for good mourning. I’d like to make you all suffer through whatever the cringiest couple in America can dish out.

Mark H

WUT?!

Mark H

Holy shit! Marilyn Monroe has a talking fetus?! I changed my vote to Blonde!

Jennifer Bourne

***Pinocchio spoiler*** I bet a million bucks they played the "maybe he didn't become a real boy" card because they hoped to crank out some sequels.

Markus D

Mixed feelings because that sounds both like it has a lot of meat to it and like it could be depressing.

TheDingoThatTookYourBaby

Blonde for certain. Who gives a rat's arse about a deadbeat dad? Also, I want a three hour GAM.

lotusmaglite

Pinocchio. I'm not going to be the only one forced to watch it.

Amanda

Whelp, I'm proud to say I haven't seen any of this shit, but I did hear about how diabolically awful Pinocchio was. I feel as if Blonde might be punching down, and Good Mourning just sounds boring. The King's Daughter would be my second vote, just because good fantasy can get so wonderfully bad when they try to cram a 600 page book into 90 minutes or so. (Is it a 600 page book? I have no idea.)

FC

Oof, tough choice. Can you do all of them? Pretty please?

Jane Doe

How can the choice NOT be Blonde? It has a talking fetus! It practically qualifies for the regular feed!

Dreamcrusher

I just saw the Fast X trailer, and I cannot wait for the GAM review!

Jenna

Yes! I want to lobby for Blonde, that’s absolutely nuts and I want to hear the guys roast it

Mark H

Didn’t you guys miss the December bonus? Shouldn’t we get two this month? 🥹

Kidda Sweet

These are really strong choices! Motion to go down this list over next few months!

HidariMak

I've seen none of them, but Blonde does have the most Razzie nominations. That alone should make it the easiest of the batch.

HidariMak

I'm surprised that they went with "Fast X" for the latest Fast & Furious movie. "Fast Ten Your Seatbelts" makes more sense.

Stuart Porter

People, the King's daughter is about Pierce Brosnan as Louis XIV trying to get immortality by capturing a mermaid! Come on!

CmdrPherret

The poll should include trailer links...

Nate

Gotta go with Good Mourning just for the variety. We’ve heard them do Disney, and awful fantasy’s and even had them sit through torture akin to talking fetuses. But no one expects the Spanish Inquisit- oops I mean Machine Gun Kelly.

Luci

I'm convinced people are voting for Pinocchio because they haven't watched the trailers for Good Mourning and The Kings Daughter. I voted for the latter, but both look pretty horrible. Pinocchio is probably just a sad remake

B. King

A bit of rest is what they deserve.

Mark H

I know, jk

Scott W. Davis

Gotta do Blonde. Come on. Kennedy scene! Abortions! Plural!

Baba Corva

Come on, Pinocchio? We all know the story there but Blonde sounds like a truly bizarre take on Monroe and The Kings Daughter looked hilariously bad

ThePaperLibrarian

Wait, so The King's Daughter isn't a wuxia drama? Boo...

Dean A. Batha

Having not seen any of these (all equally horrid) movies, and knowing nothing about them outside of the comments in this thread, I voted for Blonde. Its misogynistic theme seems appropriate, given recent news both inside and outside of the podcastiverse. I would love to hear the guys rip it to shreds, viciously.

Lou Almighty

Well I actually only know one of the four so Pinocchio it is can’t wait for the voices lol

Someday Sera

never heard of the other 3, so I guess I vote disney

Erik

After reviewing the trailers, I'm going for non-serious, non-tedious, poorly thought out, could have had some potential, could be fun to heckle: The King's Daughter. I don't want to torture the guys (Good Mourning,) don't want what looks like a downer of a movie (Blonde,) and I think Pinocchio looks like just a sad, watered down version of the original with CGI.

Steven Riggleman

Maaaan, I was looking forward to Eli explaining MGK to Noah.

godSwill

I voted "Good Mourning", reason? Simple malice.

IceBrid10

Pinocchio, because why do we need an even more creepy remake for a flim not a whole lot of people liked in the first place Disney? Is it because your secertly terrified of rolling the dice on a new story? Or because you keep firing anyone with a new screenplay to try?

Markus D

It's because Guillermo Del Toro was making his version and they wanted to get in on that shit.